Who affirms himself escapes criticism

-Jennifer Delgado For many people criticize is like breathing, they can not imagine a life without criticism. But be criticized, becoming the target, is different because it causes a lot of suffering. Inadequate criticism, made at an inappropriate time, can leave deep emotional wounds. In fact, if we look in our memory, it won’t beContinue reading “Who affirms himself escapes criticism”

7 Phrases That Will Help You Get Over a Breakup

-Jen Kim How to want to get over a breakup, part II: Say these things out loud. Repeat. Heal. Part of me can hardly remember the pain and agony that I suffered during my worst breakup. It’s only now that my best friend and I can finally giggle about our outrageous grieving mechanisms and theContinue reading “7 Phrases That Will Help You Get Over a Breakup”

How to Start Loving Yourself (Even When You Think There’s Nothing to Love)

-Sharon Martin, LCSW We talk to ourselves all day long. We comment, critique, and chastise our every move. From the big to the small – every decision and action gets scrutinized by our inner critic. For most of us, it’s harsh. Much harsher than what we say to anyone else. Where does this negative selfContinue reading “How to Start Loving Yourself (Even When You Think There’s Nothing to Love)”

Self-esteem v. Self-compassion

High self-esteem does not predict better performance or greater success. And though people with high self-esteem do think they’re more successful, objectively, they are not. High self-esteem does not make you a more effective leader, a more appealing lover, more likely to lead a healthy lifestyle, or more attractive and compelling in an interview. AContinue reading “Self-esteem v. Self-compassion”

Living Authentically

“The lies most devastating to our self-esteem are no so much the lies we tell as the lies we live.” I am living a lie when: I pretend a love I do not feel I pretend an indifference I do not feel I laugh when I need to cry I spend unnecessary stretches of timeContinue reading “Living Authentically”

A Sure-Fire Way to Silence Your Inner Critic

You can learn to dis-identify from the inner critic voice in your head. Most of us have been conditioned from childhood to be our own harshest critics. That inner judge can shadow us, scrutinizing our every move and making us quite miserable. For years, I’ve been working on turning the inner critic into an innerContinue reading “A Sure-Fire Way to Silence Your Inner Critic”

Never Good Enough

If you’re so displeased with yourself, both mentally and physically, it’s not so mysterious that you’re falling into two common cognitive traps: perfectionism and self-downing. Feeling better about who you are as a person means talking to yourself respectfully and rationally. You wouldn’t speak so harshly to your worst enemy. Calling yourself names doesn’t help,Continue reading “Never Good Enough”

20 Rules to Live By

14. Be kind, not nice. 1. Bring your sense of humor with you at all times. Bring your friends with a sense of humor. If their friends have a sense of humor, invite them, too. Remember this when going to hospitals, weight-loss centers, and funerals, as well as when going to work, coming home, wakingContinue reading “20 Rules to Live By”

Quote: Unconditional Love

Spend your time with people who love you unconditionally, not with people who want you to fulfill all their conditions. MegAnne Duke, LCSW

Self-Esteem versus Narcissism

The distinction between self-esteem and narcissism is of great significance on a personal and societal level. Self-esteem differs from narcissism in that it represents an attitude built on accomplishments we’ve mastered, values we’ve adhered to, and care we’ve shown toward others. Narcissism, conversely, is often based on a fear of failure or weakness, a focusContinue reading “Self-Esteem versus Narcissism”